I’m not sure if you remember or not but in my very first post I wrote about my wedding and how most of my husbands family and friends were not able to attend as they were in a different country. I also mentioned that we agreed with his parents that it was only fair to them that we have a wedding there. Even though we were already married when I got pregnant my mother in law said it would be a good idea to have the wedding ceremony before the baby was born so people wouldnt talk since they hadn’t seen a wedding so we agreed to it.

So we have holidays booked now to go and have this wedding the only thing is that my wedding date was not even 3 weeks after Diego died. I wanted to cancel the wedding ceremony and do it another time but I was told everything had been arranged and money had been spent so there was no chance of canceling now. Why did people expect me to go on with my normal life as if nothing had happened. My son just died can people not let me be grief-stricken? Did people expect me to just smile and be happy? Did no one have any understanding that I needed time?

So we got the coach to the airport which we then had to get the plane and then an excruciating 10 hours with temperatures above 25 celcious on a bus with no air conditioning, no toilets. We had to stop every few hours for toilet breaks and for whoever wanted to buy food or drinks. Everyone was exhausted and sweaty, we felt like sardines in a tin. Sleeping was not comfortable because the seats where as hard as stone and the streets had potholes every where so you were always bouncing from one side to another. Do after all this all I want to do is go home have a nice shower some food and go to sleep since I haven’t slept in basically more than 24 hours. Unfortunately that was not what happened. We got home to be greeted by a cloud of dust as his family were renovating the house and the toilet had not yet been finished. We got some of our things in a bag and went to his cousins house and begged him to have a shower. We had a shower and got dressed but it all felt very weird. I barely know this guy and I can’t talk to him or his girlfriend because I don’t know the language. We stayed for a while and then went home. His mum was cleaning the house from all the dust. We went to our room and slept until the morning.


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