2nd Wedding 

So the day came where I had to be a human being I had to interact with people weather I liked it or not. I had no choice in the matter as it would make others upset so I just did what I was told to do. I got up, I got dressed, I had breakfast, I went to the salon so me and my mother in law could get ready, I went home, got changed again, got in the car and went to the venue. We were the first to arrive and had to wait for everyone to come and greet them all as they were coming in. We had to stand there for 2 hours just greeting people in. Some people got me flowers which was nice of them since I knew maybe 20% of the people there and the others were all strangers to me. There was a live band and a lady that was the singer/host. She kept saying things I didn’t understand and smiling at me. My husband had to translate for me. One thing she said stuck with me. She didn’t know about what had happened. No one felt the need to tell her and since I couldn’t comunicate with her I couldn’t tell her. She told me that my first child would be a boy. That broke my heart. I don’t know how but I held it together at that time. I tried so hard not to cry. I knew it would ruin the day for my husbands family and friends. Having the bride cry at the wedding, and not tears of joy. I just about kept it together and I said to my husband my first child has already been a boy and I will never forget it. I couldn’t cry all evening because there was people and cameras fliming and taking pictures. I hated it. I couldn’t do what I wanted to do most… cry.

The night was nearly finished and I just wanted to go home. The guests were leaving and it was getting late. I was looking forward to going home. Unfortunately one of my husbands friends decided they wanted to go clubbing and since they had all been drinking my husband was the designated driver which meant I had to go with him. Now it would be a good time to let you all know that I hate clubbing with a passion. I don’t know how to dance, I don’t like being around people, I don’t like the music they play, I don’t like how it stinks of alcohol and the floor is all sticky. I enter to stay at home and relax. They all knew this. They just didn’t care that I didn’t want to go. So we went home and changed got in the car and drove nearly 1 hour to get to this stupid night club that they wanted to go to. We parked went isnide and it was overcrowded with some people that I knew and a couple of them I didn’t like and the rest were strangers. I sat down for half an hour tops and then went to wait in the car for them, my husband came with me because hes not really into clubbing either. So we put the seats back and relaxed. They came back 3 or 4 hours later when it was starting to be day time. We stopped at a food van and got something to eat and went home to sleep. I was exhausted I had been and wake for more than 24 hours and I needed sleep.

We got up around 2 since we only got home about 6.30 am had brunch and just chilled for the rest of the Sunday.  I could finally cry and let some of my pain out since I was home in our room and no one was around.


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