Most people I know are very interested in other people lives.
For example if you move out from your parents house to a place that is just your they will ask “are you not happy at your parents house”, “are you moving because you have something to hide from them” or are your parents strict is that why you are moving out?” People seem to think that there has to be something wrong with something, that is the only possible explanation to why you do something. It can’t simply be because you think its time to move on with your life and do something that makes you happy.
I remember the first time I went on holidays without my parents it was such a scandal. I mean I was only 20. Who goes on holiday without their parents at 20 years old right?? You see there was nothing wrong with this. So many teenagers went on holidays with their mates without parents and it was fine but when I did it well that was the end of the world. I didn’t go with any mates or family. I didn’t go out clubbing, I didn’t get drunk and I didn’t waste thousands of pounds. All I did while I was away was go for walks, go to the beach, read a book, watch the sunset/sunrise, watch the stars, I would see all the fisherman get ready to go out in the mornings and watch as they sailed away. I had breakfast in my hotel and lunch and dinner anywhere else I wanted. I didn’t go crazy. All I wanted was to relax and enjoy myself. Is that such a bad thing?
Anyway I got a bit side tracked with all that. My point was people are inconsiderate they say the first thing that comes to their head and don’t think they just say it out loud. Some people don’t mean to be rude or don’t know about the situations that you have had to deal with but some people are just ignorant.
I was at work the other day. Another crazy day where I’m told to do basically all the jobs. It was hectic. At one point I was working with a colleague and we were making small talk and she says to me “so do you have any children?” My heart kind of stopped for a while and I thought to my self yes I do but I’m not going to sit here and go through everything that happened to me so I just said no I don’t. Simply because if I said yes, it would have led to more questions that I wasnt ready to share the answer with her and also because people can’t handle the truth. If I said something like yes but my baby died people never know what to say and it just becomes awkward. So I left it at that obviously she couldn’t drop the subject and asked if I planed on having children and when. Now I know this girl from work. We are not close friends we are more like acquaintances I see her once a week at work that is it. This however does not mean that in going to tell you my whole life and what I have planned for the future. I’ve always liked my privacy. I’ve always liked to know what I’m doing with my life. I don’t however shout it out for the whole world to find out. People tell me I’m very secretive. I’m not really secretive I just keep my business to myself. If you don’t know what’s going on in my life that’s because we are not close enough for you to know about my business. All my family and my friends know what I’m doing and what has happened to me the last few years. Even now writing this blog about my life I choose what to write about my life.
I’m always weary when talking to people because you don’t know what’s happening at home or what they have gone through or are going through. I don’t like asking questions about their personal live when I don’t know if that will hurt that person in any way. For example I know people who have been victims of domestic abuse and are now free from this kind of torture. I don’t however go up to them and ask questions and say you should have left sooner and that was a really stupid thing to do. I know that there are things you never say and you don’t ask questions like that.
I guess what I’m trying to say is just don’t force people to talk about something they are not comfortable talking about. Peoples personal lives are just that personal. If they want to tell you something then they will.